What comes before a resolution? Reflection.

I couldn't tell you how many New Year's Resolutions I've made in my life. Not because there are too many to count but because they never really meant anything to me. I have resolved to lose weight, eat better, be more active, spend more time with friends... and so many more. I couldn't tell you what my resolution was last year or if I even made one. Why? Why could I declare something with so much conviction as to call it a Resolution and not remember it at all later? Because it came from the surface of myself and was blown off by a strong wind or rinsed off in the shower.

This year I realized that you can't resolve unless you first reflect. 

Here is my reflection and resolution for the new year:

" New years is a time of renewal. A time to take an honest look at who you have been, even if just this last year, and decide if that is who you want to be. I want to be better than I am, though I believe that I am good. I want to be the deeper, richer, truer version of myself. I want to throw off the things that I thought would make me happy and didn't and pick up afresh the things that brought me such joy but were forgotten along the way. I want to see people for the truth of who they are, just as I want to be seen as the whole of me. More love, more genuine, more willing, more honest, more me."

"Remember to forgive yourself, and to forgive others. It's too easy to be outraged these days, so much harder to change things, to reach out, to understand." - Neil Gaiman

Enjoy your new year and remember to reflect before you resolve. 

About Alyse

"Tell me about your self."

It's the question we all dread and the one we always know is coming. There are really only three options. 1. Well, what do you want to know? (wrong answer) 2. Start a 4 hour conversation on knowing yourself. (a bit overboard) 3. Picking a few thoughtful "I am" statements that fit the conversation. (ding, ding, ding! we have a winner)

You all will get a bit more than a few.

I am Alyse. (pronounced "a lease")
I am 30.
I am a wife to a loving husband and stay-at-home dad.
I am a mother of two young children.
I am a grants manager for a community foundation.
I have a degree in Communications. (Yes, I know that's not uncommon.)
I am devoted to helping people grow in their personal and professional lives.
I often believe I'm the most right person in any conversation... except for when I'm totally insecure.


"Why write a blog?"

Over the last 5 or 6 years I've had lots of friends and acquaintances come to me for advice. Sometimes on love, sometimes on marriage, sometimes on family and child rearing (though my husband is the expert there), and a lot of times on college, career, and professional topics. Since 2006 I've worked with students and aspiring professionals on topics like public speaking and decorum, resume and cover letter writing, first impressions, networking, and so much more.

This is not what I do for a living, but after friends started referring their friends to me for life-planning coffee dates and the theme "Just ask Alyse" began circulating among real life and Facebook friends alike, I just thought why not.

"What will this blog look like?"

In this space I will provide short, thoughtful answers to questions that I get asked every day. Some may be technical "How do you write a good Cover Letter?" and some may be more emotional "How do you explain having reverse gender roles in you family unit to traditionalists?"

This is an experiment for me. I hope you enjoy it. If you have a question, please leave it in the comments section and I'll get to it if I feel like I have anything worth saying on the topic. I will write from my experiences and what I've observed, more like an insightful big sister than a professor.

Here we go...